i bid you adieu... [29 Oct 2006|09:51pm] I moved out. God bless. ♥.

meaningfulness and lack thereof of things... [19 Oct 2006|08:41pm] [ mood | having trouble sleeping... ] "To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket — safe, dark, motionless, airless — it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside of Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell."  - The Four Loves by C.S. Lewis in the same way... "We do not go to hell because we sin. We go to hell because we fail to love."  - Our Parish Priest When I come across meaningful readings and pieces of advice like these, reading about networking, cabling, and their metal conduits and shit seem all the while more pointless. God bless the fearless. ♥.

taking a break from studying... [15 Oct 2006|04:58pm] [ music | john mayer - dreaming with a broken heart ] Cool. ( ... ) God bless. 1♥ - ♥.

[14 Oct 2006|11:10pm] [ mood | healing ] Very random. ( Grey's Anatomy spoiler... ) Life has been so spontaneous and random lately. It can literally change in a few minutes... seconds even. If I haven't said thank you for your time, thank you. If I haven't said thank you for just being there, thank you. If I haven't said thank you for just being you, thank you. If I haven't said thank you for accepting me as I am, thank you. If I haven't told you I loved you enough, I love you a thousand times over. God bless. ♥.

Where did I go wrong? [05 Oct 2006|11:37pm] [ music | Vivian Green - Emotional Rollercoaster ] Every aspect in my life has made a turn for the worst this week... big, drastic, even life-changing turns. I feel sick to my stomach. I want to get off this rollercoaster. I want off. Heartbreak's a bitch. God bless. ♥.

of poweroutages, college basketball, rrrrravales, and sembreak... [01 Oct 2006|10:46am] [ mood | feeling dandy & productive :) ] The newspaper said over 40.9 million people had no electricity last Thursday. Our electricity turned off 1130am Thursday and turned back on 630pm Friday. That's about 30 hours with no electricity, meaning I couldn't get any of my papers done. It was too dangerous to go outside, moreso, drive around or you'd risk a tree, a pole, or a frickin' billboard fall on your car. It was pretty scary. But not being able to do anything left a lot of time for me to, of course, sleep and think about myself and my life. Call me crazy, but I realized that without all this school work or org stuff I'm constantly pre-occupied with, I don't have much... or anything else to worry about. Meaning... school is the only thing that "worries" me because it's the only thing I have (aside from family... well you get the point) and again, I had another "there's really no need to complain about school and life" moment. It's no wonder that people who don't go to school, or have work, or have friends, or family, or a faith that they can hold onto can easily fall into depression because they just keep to themselves, wallow in their own solitude and seclude theirselves from what's out there. I may sound mean but I think it holds truth. Because during the black out, that's what I was thinking... that if I didn't have any of this (referring to the important things in my life), I'd probably fall into depression too. Times like these, again, makes me realize how blessed I am. On a completely different note, we sucked tiger's ass in Game 2. I'm quite ashamed at myself as I recall how desperate I was looking for last-minute tickets to watch the game. I texted practically everyone in my phonebook. But anyway. It was an upsetting game. And it's official that I won't be watching anymore college basketball games live as a student of the university EVER. Last na 'to. Won't be able to watch tomorrow because we have an ISA exam 430-6. *sniff*. GO ATENEO! GO TEAM, GO! A bunch of us went to Promenade, Greenhills for Ian's birthday dinner. Twas quite fun, except that Promenade was incredibly BORING that night because most of the establishments were closed/still running on generators and whatnot. Ho-hum. OH!!!!!!! But, my God, I had a dumb moment. Can you say Polo *roll your tongue with me* Rrrravales?!!?! I'm such an incredible, oblivious turd, I hate myself. Such a pretty face that boy has! But my mom told me he's dating Ara Mina? Or some big-boobed lady of that sort. Sorry. ( After my kilig moment with Polo... ) It's almost sembreak... and I still don't know what I'll be doing. I was offered an internship with Globelines last Tuesday to join their marketing team over the break. There's no pay but it would be good experience... it's mostly on-the-field work daw, meaning we'd go to events (like Shindig, they were there, did you see? :P) or plan and oversee our own events and stuff. I might do it, heck, I'll do anything that's not a desk job... but I'm still waiting for three other companies that I really, REALLY want to work for. But I'm not throwing my get-away plan out the window just yet... I need a break for me to get my thoughts straight... about my future and stuff.  I should go. I have five requirements due tomorrow and I've only done one of them. And, holy smack, it's OCTOBER!!! God bless! 2♥s - ♥.

my EVENT-ful weekend [26 Sep 2006|01:28am] [ music | the platinum pied pipers ft. tiombe lockhart - stay with me ] Have you ever experienced overwhelming frustration, disappointment, excitement and anxiety all at the same time? Your chest feels tight, you struggle for air and you wonder if there's enough oxygen pumping into your brain to get you through the day's activities? Or that feeling of helplessness and unrest that causes you to wake up in the middle of the night with your heart beat racing as you gasp for air? Or the fear that lurks in your mind of the unbearable possibility of rejection over something you've painfully worked hard for? For the past three months, especially for the past two weeks or so, though I may not have publicly expressed it, that is how was feeling. And by the grace of God last Saturday night, everything fell beautifully and perfectly into place. It was not easy. It did not go extremely smoothly. But the night was perfectly flawed. We worked for 14 hours straight on the day of. And from 7pm-3am, I was standing. I literally needed help when I finally sat down because I couldn't  feel my numb calves or bend my tired knees. *Symptoms of an old lady* My diet for the day consisted of a Jollibee salad, 3 french fries, 2 sticks of BBQ chicken, and 5 carrot sticks. Oh. And let's not forget the San Mig Light, 1 glass of Amarula and a shot of Jager. Thank God I still knew what I was doing the whole night... I think it was all the nerves and adrenaline that hindered the alcoholic effects. It's been a while since I've been out, been to a party, much less organized a party. I forgot how intoxicating the smell of sweat, cigarettes, beer breath and vomit can be so sexy. *please tell me you know I'm kidding* Oh. And thank god I didn't wear heels. At one point, I think 1230am, Nill approached me because he thought I was about to cry. I was just picking out the muta in my dry, tired eyes. Hahaha! I'm incredibly grateful for the experience... I learned SO much that can only be taught through experience. I got to meet and work with so many new people from school, different companies and different industries. I was exposed to the good, the bad, the ugly side of marketing, events management and public relations. Most of all, I discovered a lot about myself, my capabilities, my weaknesses, and that there is almost nothing that I can not do. Thank you to my family, relatives, friends and family friends that supported me (though some could not be there). Thank you to the EB for supporting us all the way through. You guys had our backs the whole time and it seriously would not have been a success without your guidance. Thank you to the 30+ sponsors who contributed to the event, especially the marketing and brand managers, my new found friends in the industry. The event - the org - would be NOTHING without your support. I thank you, I thank you. To Julo, Kamae and Nancy (Yuck, feeling close) for doing a great job hosting the event. To the models, GRABE! They were all great! Thanks for being so game. To the band that performed and to the DJ, thank you for providing us with stealth sounds perfectly fit for the event. To BMW Autohaus Libis, though we came across a lot of bumps along the way (and during the event), thank you for accommodating us, for your assitance and consideration. Our hats off to BMW, Zeno management, and the rest of the crew. And of course, thank you to the 800+ people who came and partied with us and for helping us break all previous Shindig records! (For instance, consuming all the alcoholic beverages good for 1,500 people within an hour. My goodness). Most of all, to the team. I ♥ the team. We are a resilient, dynamic, unstoppable team. David, Marco and Bea... you guys are the best and the funnest project heads ever! Hands down! *Kahit na maraming pinapagawa sa'kin si Marco during the last week! Haha. Peace, dude.* To my co-heads, Steph and Mark... galing natin. Courage under fire. Haha! We will be working together still for furture projects so this is not the end. And to the rest, Marvin ad Jacob (Promo), Sonnie, Kiko and Olive (Log), Nichael and Vicky (Ent), and Pam, Erica, Jessa and Claire (Fashion). I'm so proud of all of us. We really set the bar. I ♥ all of you! I'm seriously going to miss our Wednesday meetings at MVP. *sniff* Don't be strangers at school :) Parting is such sweet sorrow. I'm so dramatic. Moving on... I had recollection the very next day, so I only had 2 and a half hours of sleep. But it was good for me... I needed it. Bagong buhay na 'to, guys. :) And in the afternoon, I must say, Norman Black is a brilliant strategist. Malupet! Salamat naman na bumawi si Macky. You guys rule. I'm watching Game 2 fo dayum sho.  My sister and I have come to realize that in watching basketball, moreso, UAAP basketball, cussing, swearing, and dissing in all forms and languages is is a staple ritual in our family. In the words of my sister yesterday, as she screamed at the TV at JC Intal: "YOU GO BITCH! YOU TAP THAT ASS BWOI!" 'Tis good fun. Hay, life. 3 weeks to go 'til sembreak. I'm not looking forward to it just yet. Because if I learned one thing from this past experience, for the past weeks actually, it's that you gotta live in the moment, here and now, or else you'll worry your life away. So mind me if you think I'm crazy that I'm loving the stress... I'm just savoring the moment :) God bless. ♥.

of the future and events... [17 Sep 2006|09:32pm] [ music | snow patrol - chasing cars... *yes, still at it* ] SOM Night was awesome. The program wasn't dragging or anything... it was (as much as it pains me to admit, as I recall the seemingly endless struggle with MISA, Taco Bell and the Araneta Group) better than SOMNight last year. PGA Cars ba naman ang venue. With Porsche as it's major sponsor. HOLY CRAP. The deal screamed "RUDY" to me... if that makes sense. It was indeed a RED HOT night. I was with a bunch of the Force that night, and Francie of course. We mingled with the different orgs as well, and I made new friends. Yay! And I forgot how much I hate the taste of beer, moreso Red Horse. But oh well, it was free. Anyway, super kudos to Uana for handling the program... I'm proud to say she is the brains behind Shindig's fashion spread this year (which I will be distributing tomorrow) and, she's my neighbor. Haha. ANND, a big congratulations to Kamae (who will also be hosting Shindig) and Borly for hosting! Great job guys!!! This morning after going to church, we called my Tito Eddie in Canada to greet him happy birthday. And when we called, my Mom, parang sira ulo, tricked my Ate Eileen and Kuya Jimmy making them think that she was in Pearson International Airport and nagpapasundo sa kanila. Ang gago niya, hahaha! Well all of them were at Tito's 63rd birthday party... ALL OF THEM. And I got to talk to my Tito Eddie, Ate Eileen, Jan and my love, Jessie. My Ate Eileen told me they were hiring IT personnel over there... and she asked me if I wanted a job... because she (and the rest of the fam) are going to start looking for jobs for me as early as now. So I, kind of stunned, just said "OK, sounds good". *need to pause for a moment. OH MY GOD.* When I got off the phone with her (and as Kat began to talk to them), I sat on the sofa, stared blankly into the television and started to cry. *BALIW!!!* Seriously, I did. And my parents were there, asking what happened. I told them and they had another brief "talk" with me. My Dad was like, "Why are you crying, anak?" I couldn't answer and my Mom asked "Are you scared?". And I nodded and kept crying. My Dad asked "What are you afraid of?" And again, I couldn't answer. My Mom, answering on my behalf, said "Siyempre takot siya. Mixed emotions talaga mararamdaman ang mga magggraduate." The talk didn't end there, it was a bit longer too... I don't want to elaborate here. It's pretty personal and I'd rather not share it with the cyber community. I don't know why I'm so afraid of the future. I'm petrified... it's hard to describe the feeling. Whenever I try to, I'll just cry again. But when I cried earlier... it wasn't just scaredness which I was feeling... it was denial, confusion, happiness, regret, a moment of realization... it was a lot! It's really hard for me to explain... so I'd rather not. For now. That sudden question from my Ate Eileen woke me up... I have to plan my life. Or make a decision, at the very least, as to where I'll be going and what I'm going to do with my life after grad. Graduation is about 6 months away. Dear God. My answer to her question isn't definitive, as of now. But it's a reminder that, damn it, you have to make up your mind, Essa. So... I vow by the end of Sem Break, I will have a decision. Mark my words. *Gulp* One problem at a time. Once decision at a time. In the meantime...  ( Please support our baby... ) 'Til my next entry... *which I predict will be next week*. God, help us. God bless. 2♥s - ♥.

happenings for the past few days... [11 Sep 2006|09:44pm] [ music | urbandub - endless (a silent whisper) ] School has been pretty hellish for the past few weeks. Fortunately all the academic chaos will begin to subside starting today. I'm predicting things will start to pick up come fourth week of September. We had our report in Theo today on Racem in Terris (Peace on Earth) and we did good! Really good! Considering we all just crammed this last night and didn't get much sleep. I'm happy because we got a high grade (but I think it would have been higher if the video had played at the end... stupid codec). But Yay! nonetheless :) I went out yesterday with the family. First time all four of us went out together on a Sunday in.... 5-6 weeks? Yeah, a lot has been happening. I didn't buy anything. I was waiting for my paycheck to arrive so I couldn't shop. But Kat was kind enough to buy me a cute little Apple from FCUK. :) Saturday was the photoshoot for my grad pic. GAH, we're frickin' graduating in like 5 months! When I got there and put on the toga, it was so surreal man. I couldn't believe it. Anyway. My formal pic was so bad. So bad. Haha. I look like I'm about to cry or I'm scared. Sobrang pilit kasi smile ko. It's hard to smile naturally when the photographer's finger presses the shutter every half second. "Move your head. Smile! Move your chin. Smile! Face this way. Smile!" Wtf. I want to have it re-taken. Puwede ba? Because I don't want that sad, scared picture of me to be blown up and hung in our living room. But my creative shot was nice. I LOVE! It shouldn't even be considered a creative shot because I didn't do anything creative. I just smiled and posed pretty for the camera :) I took the advice of my sister and her friends (all of whom overly prepared / creatively exaggerated). They all told me "Less is more". And they were so right :) Saturday night I was supposed to go to AISEC's pajama party at the Loft (free Jager!). But then tinamad na kami ni Francie. I was tired from the day and the night before. But then Gerardo came over and brought some Chinese food. I totally pigged out. Galing ng Urrrrban Dub. Subrrra. And Congratulations to MISA! Very successful concert, kudos! Sing with me guys! "Is this the beginning of our last dance? Once around the floor, can we do it again? I feel the thrill from words we say, I love you... EMBRAAAACE!!!!" My publicist is leaving for Japan for a year to study. And I was so frickin' shocked, scared and saddened. Shocked because it was so last minute. Scared because, well, it only means that in a few months to a year's time, I'll be living independently also (most likely). And saddened because I might not see her again in a LONG time if I move back to Canada / start over in San Diego. :( Awww. I'm going to try and get some shut eye. I have a last minute meeting at Fort Bonifacio tomorrow morning. God help me with Shindig. Marami pang kailangang gawin. Kinakabahan na po ako. God bless. ♥.

[08 Sep 2006|03:55pm] [ music | that kinobe song... love it! ] Aww. I'm having a heart-to-heart with Ma'am Char over YM. Ang bait niyang tao. I swear. She's giving me ideas for my creative pose, career advice, and relationship advice *yihee*. According to her, if we were batchmates, we would have tackled MKT101 and MKT102 together. Huwatta team! Again, I'm contemplating on life (instead of doing Theo), its blessings and uncertainties. Tonight will be no exception. God bless. *And thank you God, for getting me through the week. THANK YOU!* ♥.

woo, official candidate for grad! [04 Sep 2006|09:37pm] [ mood | woo, grad! ] Guess what? I got my "checklist" today from the registrar's office and... I'M GRADUATING IN MARCH!!!!! That is if I don't screw up 'til then..... haha! Yay! God bless :) 6♥s - ♥.

officially stressed [03 Sep 2006|09:52pm] [ mood | make it stop ] I know I'm stressed when... 1. I binge eat. 2. I always feel tired. 3. I don't entertain the musings of people around me. 4. My hair starts falling out. 5. My actions, rather, lack of words puts my mother in a depressed, "I'm-a-bad-mother" mode. I'm announcing it, it's official... I'm STRESSED! I haven't felt this flustered since junior year... January 2006 from what I reckon. God, I hate this feeling. I suddenly feel like I'm at one of life's manic lows where surfacing back to "normal" seems impossible. I can't wait for this week to end. God bless us. (Especially my Mom. And my Dad. And Kat. And the world.) 2♥s - ♥.

[01 Sep 2006|12:21am] [ mood | haha, had to post again ] OMG, September na pala! Haha! BER-months! It's almost Christmas! Then grad! Whoaaa! God bless :) ♥.

[31 Aug 2006|11:31pm] [ music | hil st. soul - for the love of you ] Snoop Dogg is on Letterman's show. What a winning combo. The championship game for his football little league is called the "Snooperbowl". Haha! Random. I have a new favorite show (as of the moment) and a new favorite ass-hole of an actor. Jeremy Piven a.k.a. Ari Gold of Entourage. He just won an Emmy for Best Supporting Actor in a Musical/Drama Series. I love watching him. I love the show. It's such a dude-show, there's NO DRAMA. (Quite a refreshing change from all the soap-y series and whatnot.) I'm so into the show, the night before the Theo LT, I was watching the new Entourage episodes. Anyway. Pretty busy week. It'll be busier the next... but I don't want to go into it that much. I learned today that my groupmates and I are "Social Loafers". We loaf like there's no tomorrow - or in the MIS context - like there's no deliverable. Today after PM we had consultation with Gan. It lasted for over 40 minutes, so I ended up leaving the school 830. I must say, ang galing ni Gan. Very practical and straight to the point. Bait pa, kasi pranka. Just the kind of teacher I like (and need). He doesn't sugar-coat anything. He's the guru of constructive criticism. Hands down. I talked to Den today too during my break. We haven't had a talk like that in a while. I enjoyed catching-up, though I'm hoping I didn't make her feel bad. *Just being honest here.* I've been talking a lot this week... meetings, brain storming, orientations, consultations, recitations, presentations, kuwentuhan, and PHONE CALLS. My God, I should be reimbursed for the prepaid I've been spending on me cellie. Just lots of talking in general this week... and I doubt it'll change in the coming weeks. I could go on about what I've been doing but... I'd rather not. Too much has happened, and my memory isn't functioning as it should *it's still flooded with Social Sin, Redeptor Hominis, 10 Building Blocks, and 25 or so Bible passages.* Besides, I might just bore the readers. But despite all the requirements and stressful, very tiring university-senior lifestyle, amazingly I find I have a reason to smile and to move along. :) God bless us all in the weeks to come. ♥.

[28 Aug 2006|01:20am] [ mood | surprisingly chummy ] [ music | billie holiday - a sunday kind of love ] I'm such an exemplar student. Knowing that I have 2 long tests this week, a quiz on network diagrams, and a report on Friday, I did practically nothing over the weekend (except for dinner-date, communicate and hibernate) -  ergo - I just finished my GAN HW now. *GAH!!! GAN! GAH!!!* Our priest said in mass this morning, "We do not go to hell because we sin. We go to hell because we fail to love."  Sweet. God bless. ♥.

random new nonsense, facts, and questions... [23 Aug 2006|11:54pm] [ mood | ponder ponder ] Nonsense I mentioned earlier today that I find this guy hot, a guy who I always used to see on campus as not-that-hot. But now he's a lot better-looking because he looks "cleaner". And a lot more hot. However, K thinks I've lowered my standards because I am now apparently attracted to anyone who looks decent or "has improved." We were laughing about it, and I said... "Shit, oo nga noh." *Note to self: Eliminate subconscious strains of desperate-ism* Ick, Essa. Ick. Fact Ever wonder why there are so many damn Filipino's in California and Hawaii? Well today I learned that in 1906, multitudes of Filipino migrant workers migrated to California and to Hawaii for work. And 2006 is the Centennial year. Wala lang. It explains a lot. And it makes me wonder why most Filipinos (especially the "natives" in Hawaii that have no idea they're Filipino) don't know how and why they got to where they are now. May natutunan naman pala ako kay Dacudao. Yay. Question Is Senioritis different from Senior Syndrome? Because up until a few minutes ago, I thought they were the same. But someone told me they're different. Before I go on rambling on which is which, can anyone confirm if they're different or not? Because if they're different... if Senioritis is what Eggy claims it is... then I think I have both. Gah! I'm tired. I still owe write-ups to a few more people. Will do it within the week. God bless. ♥.

crashing and daddy's 55th [23 Aug 2006|01:43am] [ mood | much better ] [ music | dave matthews band - crash into me ] CRAAASH! *... into me...* I am going to perish in the first PM long test. On a much happier note, ( HAPPY 55TH BIRTHDAY DAAADDDDDY!!!!!!! ) Amazing how embracing (and being embraced by) loved ones just makes me feel like everything's going to be alright. God bless. 3♥s - ♥.

of God... [21 Aug 2006|04:18pm] [ music | snow patrol - chasing cars ] Nalulungkot na naman ako. Punyeta. Sabi sa'kin ng pinsan ko, "Surround yourself with people with positive energy." Yeah, like I haven't been trying. To be honest, I've been trying with every ounce of effort I can possibly exert to have "positive energy", to be "happy" and to have a positive outlook on things amidst the negativity and uncertainty I'm constantly being surrounded by (i.e. the endless complaints, rants, rejections and other problems from left and right)... and mind you all this negativity is from other people and their frickin' problems. Wala pa diyan mga problema ko, tangina.  I'm so fucking mad at the world right now. I've literally been trying to "make things happen" (no pun intended to my org) in all aspects of my life but the way things have been going, the "feedback" I've been getting, GOD. Ayoko na. Sayang lang ang effort. It's seriously pointless to exert my effort into work, school, relationships, and yet I end up going nowhere. A little consideration please, I can't do everything, I can't solve everything, I don't know everything, I'm only human for fuck's sake. I feel so useless and unappreciated! God... I want to walk away from everything and give up on all my problems, and all the people in my life because I can't help but feel like I'm being used and taken for granted. Fuck it. FUCK. But something's telling me to hold on... to hold on and to ride it out. I'm praying this is just a phase. Kasi pagod na pagod na ako. I'm just writing about it and I'm already crying... Now. Now I'm just tired... tired of trying... tired of reasoning... tired of pretending... tired of hoping... I'm just tired. I'm UNHAPPY. And I think I know why. I've been reading the Bible a lot lately. Yes, part of the reason is for Theo. But I've been reading it for myself too... before I go to bed, when I'm not in the mood to watch tv, read magazines, or go online, check my email and visit the same sites everyday. I'm reading the Bible because I want to know God. Or I need Him to be more present in my life. Because I feel like I'm such a bad person. Masama talaga akong tao, di niyo lang alam. *O kung alam niyo na masama talaga akong tao 'tas ayaw niyo lang sabihin sa'kin, I would have appreciated the honesty by telling me I'm a total self-absorbed bitch and I need to change instead of being "the-great-pretender-of-a-concerned friend".* To know God is, according to our priest and Fr. Pat, to know the Bible. And because the foundations of my Catholic background (doctrine, praxis and whatnot) is so weak, I see that God isn't present in my life... God isn't in me. So I've been reading... and I came across this: Psalms 1:1-6 True Happiness 1 Happy are those who reject the advice of evil men, who do not follow the example of sinners or join those who have no use for God. 2 Instead, they find joy in obeying the Law of the Lord, and they study it day and night. 3 They are like the trees that grow beside a stream, that bear fruit at the right time, and whose leaves do not dry up. They succeed in everything that they do. 4 But evil men are not like this at all; they are like straw that the wind blows away. 5 Sinners will be condemned by God and kept apart from God's own people. 6 The righteous are guided and protected by the Lord, but the evil are on their way to doom Verse 3, in my opinion, relates to that saying, "It's all in God's precious time." I know that. I believe in it. I have faith. And I believe I'm living by it. As I'm "waiting", I'm putting myself to (I believe) good use; I'm making the most of the time I have on this earth with the abilities I've been blessed with to live my life as God wills. But God.................. why do I feel so hurt, so lost and so tired.... what am I doing wrong? God, help me. I need your grace. God bless. ♥.

[16 Aug 2006|01:14am] [ music | inxs - new sensation ] Highlights of the day: - Bonding over crepes at Cafe Breton with Bliz - The short car ride to EEFC that lead to the birth of Winehnah and absurd rat-torture stories - The birth of Houdina, the deported Filipino-French wannabe magician (who learned his magic from a crack whore. *I think that's what he was on.*) - K's horny hirits. HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA. *Peeeace* - My humming of danceable irritating song that Bien was stripping to - Developed new "seismic dance moves" care of Bong - Discovery of the song title and artist of the danceable irritating song - The familiar stranger who smiled at me at Taco Bell - Mig Ayesa = tight-ass pants. And holy smack, that boy is RIPPED! - JD Fortune = SEXY boy... such a charming bad-ass on stage - White girls = the hell, she couldn't get her fat-ass out of the way - The glow stick amusement phase. *Partey Naa!* That's all. I have to study pa for ISA. God bless. ♥.

[14 Aug 2006|11:04pm] [ music | entourage on hbo ] Warning. This is a really shallow entry. I'm just venting out on my somewhat shallow experiences of the day. This afternoon I was amidst aspiring models of our school. They were all "auditioning" for our event in September. Big turn out. Dami palang aspiring models sa school. I felt kinda disappointed at the fact that mostly all of the kiddos trying out were freshies and sophies. I even asked one of our co-heads why weren't there any people from our batch auditoning. There were a few... and I happened to know all but one of them... I won't name names. But I think it just goes to show na wala talagang drop-dead, model-gorgeous guys in our batch. How mean. But I definetly salute them for trying. They have something I find I lack when I'm coerced to go to go-sees... CONFIDENCE. Bravo, gents, bravo. *Take note I was scoping for guys*. I think there are good-looking guys naman on campus... actually WAY BETTER LOOKING than most of the guys who auditioned earlier... guys who have already professionally modeled, had print-ads, commercials, etc. (hahahahhaha, I'm so mean. Be thankful I'm not a "judge"... but I have my say... hahaha). I'm kind of glad that they didn't audition. Weird, but I think I'd like to preserve the sanctity of their fine-looking-ness. I personally believe they're better off as campus eye candy. But again that's just my personal opinion. *Opinions aside, gorgeous or not, I'm not one to trample on anyone's dreams or aspirations. I'm all for it.* I wish I could say Marketing and planning for our event is going swimmingly but it's not. There is progress but MY GOD it's tiring and marketing for it is really testing my patience. *God, I ask that they may find kindness in their hearts to spare us enough change from their capitalist pockets so that our event will be a collaborative success. Amen.* Gahhh. Also. I think I know why I hardly ever feel accomplished with acads and my grades. I realize I have such a blatant disregard for my priorities, rather, the things that should be my priorities, like my majors. Take for instance the first long test in ISA this coming Wednesday. Instead of preparing for the exam tomorrow night, I'll be bopping my head, probably starting a mosh-pit, and singing along to songs that I don't know by a rock band that I've never heard of (before their popular tv show) all because I was given Patron tickets for free. And right now, I'm making chis-mis... with the whole who said what to who and crap. Feeling rather Shallow, Essa God bless. ♥.

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